Who taught you what love is? We all have a picture in our heads of what love is “supposed” to be…It’s a combination of what we’ve seen that looked like love to us and also things we’ve witnessed that we once determined was not love at all. For me, my grandparents were everything that I thought love should be….They always spoke to each other gently, and the way my grandpa looked at my grandma, even in old age, was magical. He was a tall, handsome carpenter that couldn’t buy her the world, so he built it for her, instead. He liked messing around in his shed….usually making something for her. He would carve little wooden hearts for her, he built little stepping stools, and even a pantry for her. And in their room, she had a special drawer of fancy, lacy night gowns that only he got to see her wear. They did special things for each other. He came home every day for lunch, and they’d watch The Young and the Restless together. He was so quiet, so gentle, so simple….She has always been a talker, and doesn’t shy away from going after what she wants, and like every woman with a passionate heart, complicated; but they were a perfect match. They didn’t have a perfect marriage, however. At times my grandma would try my grandpa’s patience, and this is where I learned the most about love….Instead of cutting her down or complaining about her nagging, he would mosey out to his shed, and paint something. He never stopped loving her.
I have a crystal vase, filled with all the marbles he collected from his paint cans. It also holds all the lucky rocks he found hidden within gravel and creek beds. And when I think back, about us walking hand in hand over so many lots of gravel, and looking around for our special rocks with the rings around them, I realize he was teaching me, that if you look hard enough, and just be patient and relax, and have fun, you will find what you’re looking for much easier. Good things are hard to find because most of the time, they are hidden, in places most people don’t look. We have to be willing to dig through the the mess to find what we desire. Even though my grandparents made being in love look so easy, I know it couldn’t have been, and that’s one of the greatest gifts anyone ever gave me….I know exactly what love looks like…and I never had to wonder if true love existed….I saw it with my own eyes….through their eyes….and it was beautiful.